Two and a Half Men: Kutcher has made the series worth watching

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Charlie Sheen with his cast mates before he had tiger blood transfusion.

Two and a Half Men completely fell apart since we found out Charlie Sheen is a freaking rock star from Mars and I just didn’t think it could make any sort of an acceptable comeback. But it actually did; I’m eating my words and following @aplusk on Twitter once again.

The episode began rather awkwardly with Charlie Harper’s funeral, filled with his ex-one night stands who actually just showed up to spit on his corpse. I guess they had to get rid of Charlie Sheen’s character in some final way, but I just thought it was really uncomfortable. On Gawker, people seemed to think it was borderline offensive but Charlie Sheen isn’t actually dead and there’s no actual corpse to offend so it was just a very clumsy beginning.

But there came Ashton Kutcher and I unexpectedly laughed out loud when he appeared outside Charlie Harper’s house after trying to kill himself in the ocean because of unreturned love, causing the actual Chalie’s ashes to be spilled all over the living room. Then, out of nowhere, Kutcher was naked and the rest of the episode was jokes about how big his penis was.

Let’s be completely honest: this show is not groundbreaking stuff, it has always been somewhat mediocre and the characters have always been disgustingly selfish for me to ever care about. It was good background noise, I suppose.

But something strange happened when I watched Two and a Half Men last night. I was actually entertained. Ashton Kutcher was good. Ashton Kutcher saved the show.

How could you, Ashton?! Now I have to watch half an hour of Jon Cryer just to hear your voice!

Political humour exhibition

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I promised this post ages ago, and since I’m supposed to be writing about something else, here I am! Ah, well. This will be pretty quick to write though because it’s mostly picture led and I’ve only chosen a few that I took. Unfortunately, I didn’t remember to write down who they were by but I’ll write a list of all the participant artists at the end.

Political humour is significant in any democracy with a considerable amount of freedom of press. Brazil has gone through a period where that wasn’t the case and this exhibition showed caricatures and comics from just after imperial times so it was really interesting to see what transformations our politics and our people have gone through.

Caption reads: The triumphant car of national progress.

Although it turns out not that many changes happened; our politicians have always been corrupt and our people still have a massive class difference driving them apart. The image above is one of the earliest comics exhibited, showing how slow on progress our government is (despite the word progress actually being on our flag).

The trophy reads: "Award for the best costume"

This one might not seem political at first but carnival isn’t just a party; it’s also a contest between samba schools. They prepare the whole year long to win the competition, the whole thing is almost a mafia, and this is a really good social commentary on who usually wins.

Top: Carnival is a democratic party! Bottom: "Well, Maria, now the party is over so you can go back to being a maid and I'll go back to being a madam"

This one is probably my favorite. The class division in Brazil is massive but there are two occasions all that it goes out the window; carnival and the world cup. Too bad it’s only pretend though.

Pretty self-explanatory, I should think.

I’ve been asked for bribes in Rio before and corruption stories are barely even news anymore, so I think most Brazilians can relate to this cartoon.

"Public Education"

Anyway, hope you enjoyed this post, sorry if it was a bit rushed but I should really get on with my day. You guys should check out these cartoons as well, they won places at the exhibition after participating in a massive contest and there’s a great one of Amy Winehouse (less funny now she died but it’s a pretty impressive image). Also, here’s the official page for the exhibition.

See you next time! x

Remembering 9/11

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(c) Flicker

My dad had lunch in the World Trade Center complex the day before it was attacked. Whenever he talks about it, I get chills all over. I was only ten at the time but I remember how the world stopped and watched the towers tumble to the ground, changing the history of the most powerful nation on earth.

He was in the USA on a business trip and he left New York on the 10th to attend some meetings in Chicago the next day. I was so young I didn’t even remember that at first, people thought the plane crashing into the first tower was an accident. My dad watched the second plane crash into the building with the broadcast journalist going “OH MY GOD, THERE’S A SECOND PLANE -”.

There were no meetings that day. There was a plane that was missing and the media were saying it was headed to the Sears Tower, located in Chicago, precisely two blocks away from where my dad was. Needless to say people ran for their lives, headed for Canada; it was a ghost town. My dad and the people who were with him did what they could; got away from the tower on foot as fast as they could.

It was a truly defining moment in history, and it’s been exactly ten years today. A defining moment that resulted in a stupid war and the ruin of the United States. It’s just so important to remember what caused all of this mess, not only because of the lives lost, but because of how deeply a whole population was wounded.

New things I am into that you should try too

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Comics – Transmetropolitan by Warren Ellis (DC Comics)

I had been meaning to get into comics for a while and in my many chats with my lovely friend Danny Leitch, he told me to start geeking out by reading Transmetropolitan. This is a somewhat dark (although to be honest I’ve got nothing to compare it to) comic about the manic journalist Spider Jerusalem and his pretty fierce sidekick (and super hot) Channon. Spider is basically the most badass journalist you can think of, he will do anything to get the truth and I mean anything. It’s completely brilliant and I’m absolutely loving it; you can learn a thing or two from this guy. And you will laugh a lot. Download it here.

Charity – Freddie For a Day for the Mercury Phoenix Trust

I really wish I had come across this a bit earlier in the year because Freddie Mercury’s birthday just passed, but I didn’t. I’ve been searching for some sort of charity to do because I haven’t raise money or donated any real value since I graduated high school. Anyway, I came across this amazing campaign where you ask you friends to sponsor you and you dress like Freddie Mercury for a day (more specifically on his birthday, 5th of September)! And it’s for Aids and HIV patients! I am so doing this next year, I already made an account on justgiving.com for when it starts all over again. I know it seems like poor effort to just put on a mustache and some bright clothes on but a) I’m not athletic and I would actually die trying to climb a mountain/run a marathon or whatever it is normal people do when raising money b) I bet everyone wants to see me in a mustache. Interested? You should be. More info here.

Pottermore

Okay, I know this isn’t strictly new for me and if you follow me on Twitter you will know that I have been freaking out about getting on it. I am indeed a beta tester for Pottermore and let me tell you that it is an awesome experience; it’s beautiful. The graphics are so detailed, it’s actually magical. You get to be sorted into your house, and I am an official Gryffindor! Pottermore will be open to all in October and I recommend it to everyone. I think this is the future of books, to be honest. Why the hell not? Sign up for more information here.

Reviewing albums

Don’t get me wrong, I love music. I love it. But I don’t really know how to write about it. But I am going to an Elton John concert in Rock in Rio and I have been struggling with my writing lately. I need inspiration, I need music. So I have a new project for this blog, I am reviewing one of Elton John’s album’s every week (even after seeing him live, because I am that committed to him). Why? For kicks, really. But I was wondering, do any of you know how to review an album? Tweet me?

Oh, also… Adele. She’s great. Buy her music now.
xx

Lack of inspiration

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This is what I've been doing and what's on my mind.

So I’ve hit a wall. I’ve been blogging for the Independent quite consistently and this week I have found absolutely nothing to write about. Naturally, I checked everywhere for inspiration, Twitter, Tumblr, Facebook, Brazilian newspapers, English newspapers, American newspapers… nothing. How very disappointing.

Let me explain. I like to write about things that I actually know something about, or that I have a pretty strong opinion about, or that are potentially new to the person who will read it. I am really against repeating opinions and analyzing things I really don’t have enough experience to analyze, so I’m coming up short at my meek 20 years of age and roughly 3 years of journalism experience.

Pause. Oh look at that, I just had an idea. Can you believe that? I am possibly the most ridiculous human being on the blogosphere, but I hope you enjoy me.

I have absolutely nothing of interest to tell you with this post, but I would love, love to hear/read what you guys do when you lack inspiration?

x

I have failed – but succeeded!

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I haven’t written in my blog as much as I should this summer, which is a shame. I blogged about a month ago but I didn’t really like the result so I deleted the post ( I am officially that kind of blogger) so I have hypothetically failed at one of my Summer Aims. Oh and of course I haven’t been waking up at ten every morning like I wanted to – and I have NOT learned shorthand. At all.

Anyway, this is a short post to let you know of the stuff I have done but weren’t on the list. Here are some links for you.

My Independent Blog
And I’ve been writing for Electric City UK about pop music – which I love.
I’ve been also compulsively updating my LinkedIn profile, so check that out if you would like me to (potentially) write for you.

Anyway, I hope to write some stuff here soon, it’s just so hard to get motivated during summer…

x

Summer aims.

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Summer is always that time when you mean to do loads of projects but just end up sleeping till 12 (or later) and watching TV all day. But I have decided to fight this and actually set myself some lovely goals. It will be difficult but who cares? If I get through most of them I’ll be happy.

1. Make a start as a freelance journalist
2. Ace my Reuters interview
3. Write in my blog at least once a week
4. Take a photography course
5. Learn shorthand (at last)
6. Apply for work  experience for next year (Exposed and The Star)
7. Find stories to pitch
8. Wake up before 10.30AM every day
9. Come up with FOIs to send
10. Get a job writing

I’ll cross them out if I ever get them done and keep you posted in future posts… Definitely worried about numbers 2 and 8.

x

Rio – The Movie

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RioAs a Brazilian, I’ll be the first to say that I do not wholly embrace my culture; I really hate those “awesome street parties” – as most English-speaking people seem to call them – that we have during Carnaval and I don’t really listen to samba that much. In fact I barely ever listen to any traditional Brazilian music.

But this is not to say I don’t completely cherish my culture. I do like Carnaval; the actual parade, the part that isn’t a bunch of drunk men dressing up as women pissing all over the street, is one of the most amazing things in the world. I’ve never actually seen it live since it’s quite expensive to get a ticket, but I obsessively watch the floats on the TV.

And I absolutely love Rio de Janeiro, it’s one of the best places I’ve ever lived. So I was quite demanding of a film that promised to show the world how my favorite city in the world really is.

Whenever American films attempt to depict Brazil or Brazilians, they simply fail. Let me make it really clear: we are NOT in any way Spanish, we do not SOUND Spanish or act like Spanish people. We do not keep monkeys as pets nor do our gangsters kidnap tourists to steal their organs. Also, please, please STOP playing Girl from Ipanema whenever people go into elevators or start having sex in films; it’s actually an amazing song, not some track you can use to smooth out awkward situations.

But this movie depicts Rio perfectly. There are a couple of technicalities that were wrong because of how the plot is set up, but despite that it’s pretty right on. I was afraid it would be too stereotypical but it’s not.

Telling the story of  Blu, the only male blue macaw left in the world, it exposes Rio and the kind of culture shock foreigners experience when visiting. This is probably why I liked it so much, there’s little else I enjoy more than showing Rio around to foreigners; I love their reactions to it and their appreciation of it.

Besides that, it really depicts Carnaval how it really is. Everyone can dance (okay, maybe apart from me), and everyone is out partying; and everyone has had those moments when you run into some one you’re really not that intimate with wearing a full on feathery bikini costume in the streets, clearly off their faces, getting with some one they blatantly had never met before in their lives (seriously, true story – I saw one of my school teachers in a similar situation before). Obviously, as it is a movie aimed at children they haven’t made that situation quite so awkward.

The design and graphics left me completely speechless. I am very aware that my city is beautiful but this can’t really be captured by a photograph – but this was just amazing. It literally almost made me cry when they first showed the parade in the Sambódromo Marquês de Sapucaí, with the samba school Salgueiro dancing down the Carnaval specialised street. [Sidebar: This year's Salgueiro samba parade had special floats and costumes to celebrate being in the movie, as their theme was cinema in Rio. It also had a whole section of people dressed as policemen from Elite Squad 2 - which, by the way is an amazing film as well. Anyway, here's a link to the real thing.]

Something that really astonished me about this movie is the music. I really had no idea that it would be so concentrated on the music but it makes sense, that is another factor that makes our culture famous. It really annoys me that the most promoted song for the film is the one produced by will.i.am (this is not his first mess around with Brazilian music, actually and here’s another bizarro remix I found) because there are so many better tracks that could better show the Brazilian musical character, like the movie’s opening song. The bossa nova track is also amazing – I’ll post it here when I find it.

Anyway, watch this film! Just do it, I don’t care if you don’t like animations.

LibDem Conference? Look at those hipsters.

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If you’re wanting a serious coverage of the Liberal Democrats Conference in Sheffield, I suggest you go to www.forgetoday.com or follow Mikey Smith‘s tweets on the Sheffield Politics’ twitter account.

Wow, that was a lot of linking!

Anyway, I didn’t arrive to see the beginning of the protest or the arrest of a random protester who jumped over the barrier – video by ForgeTV here -  but I did take some interesting pictures. Not really news worthy so I figured I’d post them here.

This is Sheffield City Centre today. I was told there were around 5,000 people there earlier, but when I got there this was what was left. Loads of people who were part of the conference were just hanging out on the steps of Sheffield City Hall, behind the steel fence to prevent violent protesters.

By the time I got there, it just looked like a street party that had died down – there were some teenegers banging on the barriers but I guess I missed out on the main action.

Here are some hipsters asking people to protest by dancing to their reggae music. Around ten people were actually doing it, including two guys wearing Nick Clegg and David Cameron face masks. I wish they were the real thing.

And guess what? The city’s own Jack Sparrow made an appearance – mind you, I had no idea pirates cared about politics or budget cuts. Surely they’d just loot and steal regardless?

There he is, the surprisingly political Jack Sparrow, speaking to a fan. He was also dancing as a way of protest.

The next picture is one that makes me pity Nick Clegg a little bit. You are the most hated man in the country, Mr. Clegg, and I am sorry to report that your character has caused some one to design the following protest sign:

Some one must have had fun making this, I know I couldn't stop laughing as soon as I saw it. Poor Clegg.

As I was leaving the protest area, I heard some one sing about freedom. Libyan protesters were attempting to hijack the whole thing – it’s alright though, I sympathize with their cause. However it doesn’t make it any less awkward to go from dancing hipsters to a choir of people asking for their country’s freedom. It was actually somewhat depressing.

"We want freedom"

The amount of policemen just hanging around waiting for something to happen was crazy. They didn’t seem as excited by the ice cream truck that emerged like I was though.

Caught you yawning, ey? It's alright, the protest wasn't that exciting overall.

Sorry about that last one being so small. I could crop it and make the yawning policeman more visible, I suppose, but I have work to do so you’re all going to have to accept it like it is.

Anyway, that was my day. I ended up buying £8 worth of magazines and £6 worth of books when I went into town to buy a new dress. Once a geek always a geek, I suppose.

Oh, also read my article on the Tunisian uprisings for the University of Sheffield’s Student Politics E-zine Canvas. It doesn’t have my name on the entry – which I suspect is because I missed my deadline several times – but I did write it and I can prove it!

See you next time.

Has the Brazilian government finally cracked the favelas?

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Brazil is a democratic state but there are places where democracy does not reach; the favelas in Rio de Janeiro have been long abandoned by the government.

With firearms and violence the drug lords called themselves bosses, and for years, basic services like electricity and water were provided by the drug mafia. In exchange for the inhabitant’s silence, they will be provided for and allowed to live in their territory.

Needless to say that this is an arrangement that forces people to live in precarious conditions and revokes their basic human right to live in freedom and safety. Reports to the Brazilian media reveal that people from the favelas witness crime daily and the terror is constant. Men carrying heavy firearms to guard the favela from policemen is simply part of the scenery.

The authorities that manage to reach the favelas are usually corrupt. For the most part, policemen will take bribes to keep their mouths shut and the drug traffic running. The only force rid of corruption is Battalion of Special Police Operations (BOPE), whose men are specifically trained to deal with urban warfare.

BOPE, however, has been condemned by Amnesty International for “constantly violating the human rights of a large part of the population.” They are said to be just as cruel as the drug mobsters by people who live in the favelas; they are scarcely the image of protection a police force should be.

UN has repeatedly criticized the conditions in which favela inhabitants are found in, but what astounds me the most is the enormous inequality spread all over the city. It is as if the slums are completely different worlds inside of Rio; little totalitarian states with precarious living conditions that exist in a seemingly functional democracy. This is why I think the Rio scenery is so striking: you can see the well-off parts on the planes and incredible poverty up the hills.

Plans to fix this situation have been made before, but none of them worked for long enough to eradicate the real problem; the armed drug gangs. Ex-President Lula’s Growth Acceleration Program (PAC), which is not specifically focused on the improvement of favelas, but on the improvement of the less privileged and aspects of Brazil’s infrastructure, has barely scratched the surface.

The issue here is that PAC is only a half-hearted attempt to fix things – building a football field there, a new museum here, etc. These projects are blatantly ignoring the problem; how will a mother ever let a kid go play football with the drug gangs carrying loaded guns everywhere? How can people walk to and from home when a war between the drug gangs and the police can erupt at any moment?

But even if these projects were to make a big impact on society, only 3,8% of the projects planned by PAC in Rio were ever completed anyway and the rest sits unfinished. So even if there was a legitimate plan to save the favela population, it would probably fail – the government doesn’t seem to complete many of their projects.

However, a new pacification program seems to be working and breaking through my cold skepticism; the implementation of Peacemaking Police Units (UPPs). These units appear to have sprouted from the long due realization that most people in the favelas are not drug mobsters and really need the authorities’ protection. They are implemented to impose order, prevent crime and protect the population in the favelas.

The program started in 2008, with the pacification of the favela Dona Marta. Things changed; electricity and cable companies have managed to establish good relations with the people and provide them with safe and legal services. Businesses that were afraid to expand because of the violence have now flourished and the value of property has doubled.

Unfortunately, however, for the unit to be implemented the drug gangs must be eradicated from the favelas first.

The police are sent in to rid the area of drug trafficking; last November, Rio was in a veritable civil war when a mass operation to pacify 20 favelas was carried out. The 17,500 police officers who were operating to rid the favelas of drugs had to be aided by 800 army soldiers. Around 150 arrests were made and an estimated 17,000 children were left unable to attend lessons. An official number of deaths was not released.

At the time I was at loss at what to think about the invasion because there were an incredible number of news stories about innocent people being murdered by stray bullets or cruel retaliation from both sides of the war. One of the most shocking things for me was a quote from the BOPE Captain, Rodrigo Pimentel: “I believe the task of forgiving the drug mobsters is up to God. With us, from the Special Forces, lies the task of promoting the encounter between them.”

But now I can see that maybe this is a program that will follow through with its promises; the UPPs are going to stay, this is not just a temporary development. The reason for this is the international scrutiny that Brazil is under at the moment because of the 2014 World Cup and the 2016 Olympics. In fact, this is why the program is being implemented in the first place and why its objective is to occupy and pacify 100 favelas before 2014. It has to work because the country’s reputation is on the line. It is definitely not the right reason to fix the problem – but hopefully it will have the right result.

I’ve always been told that Brazil is the country of the future and never believed it – how could it be if the government failed to protect so many people every day? Maybe this is the start of an era where I can start believing.

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